What to do after a second date? So, congratulations to you because you are here after Googling what to do after a second date and it shows that you have successfully gone on a second date and you are wondering what to do next to bring this to the next level.
What to do after a second date? It all depends on what you have been doing during the first two days and how much you have known each other to decide what is the best thing to do during the subsequent date. So let’s dive into the topic and look at some of the states of mind that the both of you could be in and also what best you can do during your third date.
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I’m Jasveena and I have been blogging since 2013, documenting my experience as well as helpful professional resources and tips I found online in seeking meaningful relationships and connections, and I am here to share them with you so that you are not alone in cruising through this journey called life that may seem like a lonely path.
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How cute would it be to send this witty dating app greeting card to your boyfriend if you met him through a dating app for one of your monthsaries? Maybe you should get one since you are going on a third date already.
My Experience
I used to wonder what to do after a second date just like you because my goal was to properly identify if the person that I was dating was suitable for me before we even went on multiple dates and then found out that we were not a good match.
Honestly, if I did not really know this person in terms of their lifestyle and in terms of what they actually looking for if the both of us have similar interests and intentions for dating, I would really be very restless and anxious knowing that I am going on a third date with this person but I have not figured out some of the most important things yet.
Most dates would and by the second date. Even before I go for the third date, if I communicate properly with someone and try to identify their intention to see if we are on the same page, things would and by the second date at most. However, there were times that I have gone on third dates and I have to say that the reason why I went on third dates with people is because I have not really paid attention to the signals from them indicating that they are not the right person.
It is really not how many days that you go with someone but it is how cleverly you judge someone and you decide if it is even worth going on a third date with people.
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How To Gauge Where You Are Now In Dating?
What to do after a second date largely depends on where you are now in dating. Let’s look at some of the things that you should have discovered about each other by now.
- You Spoke About Dating Intentions
If you are over 30 years old, especially if you are 35 and single just like me, you probably would have known what you’re looking for in a relationship by now. Therefore, speaking about dating intentions can be really important for people who are above 30 because they do not want to waste a lot of time talking to the wrong person.
So, if you have completed your second date with someone, have you spoken about dating intentionally and have you found out their intention to date you? Are you guys on the same page?
- You Know Some Of The Basic Information About Them
If you have gone on a second date with someone, you should have known some of the basic information about them which includes the occupation, where they are living, and some of the daily routines. Do they like going to the gym? Do they enjoy doing some of the activities that you like doing? You should also know if you think about the dating history and a little bit about their family.
- You Feel Like Meeting Them Again
So, you’ve gone on a second date with them and you’re wondering what to do after a second date, this means that you feel like meeting them again and you want to make a proper plan for the next date. It is a good signal and it is a green flag indicating that you enjoy spending time with them and you just want to see them again.
If they are also making plans to meet you actively, this is a bingo because the board of you are on the same page and the both of you feel the same towards each other!
- You Should Have Exchanged Number Right Now
If you have met this on a dating app and you have been reluctant about exchanging numbers initially, after the second date, you should have been comfortable enough in exchanging numbers.
What To Do After A Second Date: Your 3rd Date Guide
- Escape Room Date Night
Basically, an escape room is one in which people are locked in order to play a game requiring them to solve a series of puzzles within a certain amount of time to accomplish a goal, typically finding the key to unlock the room. They will have to race against the clock and decipher clues to find their way out of the escape room.
This adrenaline-pumping activity enables you to see your partner under pressure and in a competitive environment. This could be something different to do than your first two dates.
- Talk About Goals And Aspirations
Also, it is important to focus on not just doing activities together but also to talk about goals and aspirations that you have in life. Most of the time, during the first two dates, it would mostly focus on just getting to know the general information about each other, the likes and dislikes, and just about any random things that come to your mind rather than asking objective questions like goals and aspirations.
This is important because, based on my experience, I got to know after the second date with someone that he is planning to move out of the place that he is staying in currently and he has different career plans which may affect my career.
We really do not know each other much within the first two dates, especially if the dates are very short and if you do have not much time to get to know each other well.
- Talk About Family and Friends
This is really important, especially for people who want to make sure that they are not going on a date with someone’s husband or someone’s wife, and also to make sure that you understand a little bit about the family dynamics and also the friends. This is crucial because you don’t want to end up on discreet dates. If someone is not opening up about their family and friends and they are being really secretive about their social life, this is going to be a red flag because they should be able to share information about family and friends at this point in time during the third date.
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- Go For Activities Like Hiking
I know for some of you who love to do activities rather than just going on coffee dates, it would be very tempting to try different activities and also to see if you could gel well with your partner when you are out there doing activities rather than just sitting and talking all day long. Hiking can definitely be a great activity because this is going to show the other side of yourself to your partner like your stamina, how well you cooperate with each other in public, whether are you going to be a good activity partner, and things like that.
You will also learn a lot of things about your partner when different situations arise like how they react to a tiring day and how they accommodate your needs when the both of you are doing the activity.
What Should You Not Expect Right After The 2nd Date?
- To Know If It Is the Right Person
You are not supposed to go for a third date in the mindset of finding out if this is the right person for you. You possibly would not be able to figure out if it is the right person for you on the third date because you’re just actually getting to know them. The first two dates are rather the ice-breaking session whereby you get to know very basic things about them.
- To Rush into meeting family and friends
Also, just because you talk about family and friends, the third date is also not very appropriate to go and meet family and friends. This is because you possibly would not have made your mind up yet about this person for you to confidently introduce them to your family and friends. Furthermore, you also do not want your family and friends’ opinions to cloud your judgment.
- To Overshare about each other
The third date is also not an opportunity for you to overshare your life with your partner. This does not mean that you shouldn’t be vulnerable enough to them but you should also not be sharing problems from 10 years ago and how your childhood has affected you as a person or even bad mouth people in your life.
A lot of people resort to emotional dumping because they think that this is going to bring them closer to their partner but this can also overwhelm people because too strong of an emotion can be off-putting.
- To Discuss Future Together (Future Faking)
The third date is also not an opportunity for you to discuss your future together because you will end up future-faking if you do this. It is good to share aspirations and goals that you have separately as an individual to see if the both of you have something in common to work on. However, you cannot go on a third date trying to create a future together or trying to see what life would look like if the both of you were to be in a relationship and decide on it.
- To Go On Vacation Together
This one is a big no and it is also a red flag if a guy asks you out on a vacation together on a third date because you barely know him and you do not have any idea if this person is going to be in your life next month. So, if someone suggests going for a vacation together when you are supposed to be doing a third date that does not involve much intimacy yet, you should explicitly reject them because this is going to emotionally mess you up especially if the guy is not serious about you.
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FAQs
What should happen after 2nd date?
Ideally, after the second date, you should be able to gauge how comfortable you are when you are around the person that you’re dating. When you are going on a third date, you should focus on identifying their values, aspirations, and family dynamics, and get a sense of whether or not this person is a good fit for you to consider as a long-term partner.
Should you text everyday after second date?
Texting frequency or even communication frequencies is something that is very subjective and ideally, what two people should do is to discuss with each other what makes the both of them comfortable. Someone might need regular texting whereas someone else could be okay without texting for a day or two when dating. The key is to make sure that both people are emotionally secure.
How do I keep him interested after a second date?
If you think about keeping him interested after a second date, you would be very much in an analysis paralysis mode because you would want to impress him. Rather than keeping him interested, you should think about whether or not you are having fun when you are with this person.
How do you know if the second date went well?
- You both could be yourselves without forcing yourself to impress each other.
- You feel like you want to see them again and they feel the same about you.
- You will not fixate on your phone and you will be fully present, listening to this send that you are dating.
- That are mutual attractions and interests between the both of you that keep the conversation going.
- You are not wondering if they like you or not because you know that they like you.