Should I add him on Facebook or should I wait for a bit? If you are dating someone and you are not sure if you should send this guy a friend request on Facebook, because you want to know more about this person but also do not want to see him too pushy, then maybe my three personally proven tips would help you to decide what’s best for you.
Social media presence can be extremely important in today’s dating landscape because not only it prove your authenticity but it shows people that you are not a shady person and you have nothing to hide from the public. It’s more like walking into the bank to apply for a loan and having the bank officer explain to you that they would like to assess your credit score and your past repayment histories.
I’m not saying that you should be stalking someone to see how many girlfriends they had in the past, but social media presence would give you an overview of someone’s personality to an extent although you should not heavily rely on it to judge someone.
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My Experience
I’ve come across many moments where I felt tempted and I was asking myself “Should I add him on Facebook”.
This is especially true if someone has a presence on Facebook but they have kept their Facebook private and you’re not able to see a lot of things on it until and unless you become a connection with them on Facebook.
Although in the beginning, when I was new to the dating scene, I would want to add this person on Facebook but I would also hesitate a lot because as an introvert and as a private person, I’ve kept my social media very private and I do not add people that I do not know to my connection.
However, as time passed, when I became more comfortable dating a lot of people, I would add people only if I saw the connection growing.
Have you ever had moments like you feel relationship moving fast but feels right? I’ve come across moments like this before as well and this is exactly when I would add them to my social media accounts because I would want to make sure that I’m not ignoring any of the red flags that I’m supposed to be aware of.
Adding on Facebook is one thing but I would also make it a point to remove them if we are no longer interested in seeing each other.
Early Phase Dating Concerns
As much as we want to avoid judging people prematurely, we also want to get to know them and their lives a little bit from social media and probably professional pages like LinkedIn. This is where people portray themselves from different angles and different perspectives depending upon their interests and professional standpoints.
So, should I add him on Facebook? This can seem too fast for some people if you have just been on a few dates with this person but for some others, especially if you have been on Bumble and some other dating apps, where people would connect the Instagram account to the dating app to connect better with people.
Whereas, some others would say that they are not comfortable sharing social media handles with someone that they have just begun to date.
As intrusive as it can seem, adding strangers to our Facebook account can be intimidating and scary, especially for introverts. If you are dating, this is something that you should be doing especially if you have been dating for more than a month and you would want to have a sneak peek into their lives.
There are so many married men on dating apps and if you do not do a background check for marriage, you probably would end up having a pseudo boyfriend and you wouldn’t know about him and his marital status if you go about thinking that you shouldn’t be judging someone based on the social media account.
Should I add Him On Facebook? 3 Yes and 3 Nos
- If You’d Want To Verify If He Is Not Shady
Should I add him on Facebook? If you want to verify if this is a legit person and he’s not shady as in he is hiding his marital status or any other information that may help identify if you would want to continue dating him or not.
Even after going on a few dates if he is refusing to share his social media handle and if you feel that he is being secretive, that is probably something fishy about this guy
- If You Would Like To See If You Have Mutual Friends
Mutual friends can be really helpful in finding out about a person that you’re dating. It is through mutual friends that you can find out if they are married or if they are a good candidate for you to date.
So, you should add someone on Facebook if you would like to know how the both of you connected in a social circle.
The opinions of people, however, may not exactly reflect a person. Therefore, you should be careful about who you are asking for an opinion about someone.
I was able to seek help from a friend to ask her friend about a guy that I was dating and I got to know that he was married with kids.
- If You Would Like To Gauge Their Personality
Adding them on social media would help you to gauge their personality so do not be afraid to let yourself be seen as well. From the hashtags that they use to the choice of photos that they have on their Facebook, you can learn a lot of things about someone. How they comment on someone else’s posts would tell you what kind of interactions they have with their friends.
Should I add Him On Facebook? 3 Nos
- If You Tend To Overthink/Judge Someone
Should I add him on Facebook if I tend to overthink and judge someone? Probably not. I would recommend you go on a few dates first and then add him on Facebook because you would be able to see him for real and try to understand him in person as compared to going through Facebook and judging him from his social media activities.
Some people tend to stalk too much and go through their friends list obsessively. If this sounds like you, you should probably put the idea of adding them to your social media accounts on hold.
- If You Are Still Not Comfortable
If you’re not comfortable adding them on Facebook, you should not do that yet. I can’t quite put this into words but you just get some sort of weird uncomfortable feeling about some people and it makes you feel that you’re not comfortable adding them to your social media connection.
If you have some sort of strange unexplainable feeling, you should not add them yet.
- If It Is Still An Early Dating Phase
If you have just swiped right on this person, and suddenly you get an invitation from them to connect on Facebook, this may not be a good idea because probably all they want to do is to check out your other photos instead of asking you directly “can I see more of your photos” which is quite eerie and uncomfortable. Adding random Tom, Dick, and Harry to your Facebook can be stressful.
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FAQs
When should you add a guy on Facebook?
When you notice that things are moving a little bit fast and you kind of really like this person and you want to do a background check for marriage, then you should definitely add them on Facebook because this is going to give you a better overview of someone.
Should you add your crush on Facebook?
It would not be awkward if you already share a social circle with your crush. People tend to accept Facebook requests from those within their community. Let’s say you are a writer and you already have a few common friends on Facebook, this would make things seem less awkward when you are sending a friend request.
Is it too forward to add a guy on Facebook?
It is not too forward to add a guy on Facebook as a woman but if it is not something that’s comfortable for you, or if you are going to doubt your decision by adding him, I would recommend holding the decision for a bit. You should also be prepared to be ignored by the guy because not all the time people accept random friend requests on Facebook.
Should you add him on social media?
You should add someone on social media if you have common interests with them. Even if you do not have a connection with them yet like mutual friends, if you add them on Facebook, be prepared to either be ignored or even if they add you, they are probably not going to reach out to you first.
