Situationship Vs Friends With Benefits: 3 Disgusting Myths

Situationship vs friends with benefits: with new lexicons in the dating scene, you must be wondering what are the differences between them both. 

While both arrangements short-lived and messy a lot of times, and even sometimes they don’t really have a distinctive characteristic to tell them apart, especially when you connecting with people and you just do not know where you fall comma there are three disgusting myths that you should beware of so that you don’t get stuck in either one of the situation. 

Is situationship good? Well, it can be good if that’s what both of you want especially for people who are freshly out of a relationship, and they are still hurt and not ready for full-fledged commitment.

But here are the three ways to tell them apart and what you should beware of to understand if a connection is going to serve you well.

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I’m Jasveena and I have been blogging since 2013, documenting my experience as well as helpful professional resources and tips I found online in seeking meaningful relationships and connections, and I am here to share them with you so that you are not alone in cruising through this journey called life that may seem like a lonely path.

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My Experience

Being in the dating scene for the past few years, I’ve come across people who I’ve started to talk to with romantic interest in mind and things do not progress well, leading to either one of us clinging on to each other.

As for friends, when we are in our 20s, especially when we are in college, it is common to have a lot of friends and we would make friends with people from the opposite gender freely without really having an agenda in mind. However, when you step into your 30s, and a lot of people are now looking to settle down, it is hard to actually even be friends with people from the opposite gender anymore.

So, even if you have friends from the opposite gender, if it is not fully platonic, and if at all they show signs that they are romantically interested in you and if it does not progress into a relationship, this could also be a messy friendship which is no longer a friendship. And what’s sad is the fact that you kind of like lost a friend there because you actually are no longer really friends with them.

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Situationship Vs Friends With Benefits: 3 Differences

  1. Level of “Friendship”

So, in a situationship, where you are not friends with them and you actually get to know people with the intention of wanting to find a partner. So, what usually happens is that as the two people are getting to know each other, either one of them thinks that it’s not going to work out. So, if this is not being made explicitly known, the other person is going to be under the impression that the two of them are still in talking terms in the process of getting to know each other to develop a romantic relationship. 

Whereas, in friends with benefits arrangement, you probably would have established friendship with this person before. This is not going to be a stranger and usually, you have known them for quite some time before.

  1. Level of “Romance”

If you are wondering the level of romance involved in situationship vs friends with benefits, here it is:

Now, in situationship, there is definitely romance involved because you would start talking to this person with a romantic interest in mind. However, it is not growing into a full relationship.

Well, in the Friends with Benefits arrangement, what can I say, it’s more like f*** buddies where you actually have a good understanding about each other, you have good communication between each other but you don’t necessarily have romantic conversations explicitly. Usually,  you do not have pet names for the comma; you tend to go back to treating them like a normal friend after the sex is over. 

Lust is definitely present and probably some level of romance but it would be awkward for the two people to even admit it because actually, they are friends.

  1. Do They Keep In Touch?

No, in situationship arrangements, usually people do not really keep in touch, because remember, either one of them is not really interested in developing this into a full-fledged relationship. Therefore, one person would be chasing after the other and expecting more attention from the other. That is not really a tendency to keep in touch. 

Whereas, in the Friends with Benefits arrangement, people have already been friends and therefore it is very easy for them to naturally circle back into each other’s lives like nothing has happened in the past. It is actually harder to leave this messy arrangement because of the level of understanding that both of you have established.

It is actually hard to distinguish the difference between situationship vs friends with benefits in terms of how often people keep in touch because it is often not a definite thing, and varies from one couple to another.

3 Disgusting Myths

  • It Is Still Detrimental To You

Let’s not look at what label you give the connection and do not compare situationship vs friends with benefits, because not matter what it is, it is still going to be detrimental to you. One person is going to be wanting more than the other in the connection, and therefore they are going to be less wanting more and not having the needs and wants met.

  • Your “Friend” Secretly Doesn’t Want You To Find Someone 

If you are in a messy Friends with benefits arrangement, your friend secretly does not want you to find someone because they still want to benefit from the no-string-attached connection that you have established with them.

So, friends are supposed to be people who genuinely want good things for you. If at all this person wants you to not find someone just because they want to benefit something from the connection that you have with them, this is definitely a sign that you need to respect yourself and walk away from the arrangement.

  • You Often Cannot Tell The Difference Between The Two

Situationship vs friends with benefits? While you are reading the points above, you definitely must have thought that what are the actual differences between the two, because it is definitely impossible to be purely friends without having romantic interests but also f****** each other occasionally. 

Isn’t it messy? So, it doesn’t matter what category this messy thing falls into, what matters most is that you know what you are getting yourself into and you know how to exit if this is not doing any good for your mental health.

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FAQs

Is a situationship a hookup?

Hookup is just to hook up whereby you meet someone and you do not have anything to do with them but you only have a physical connection with them. However, in the case of situationship come out by people actually get to know in love intention to find a partner and it may not have grown into a full-fledged relationship but they are still emotionally connected to each other with the sexual chemistry involved.

Is situationship considered dating?

A situationship actually starts from dating, and either one of them will eventually lose interest in the other and may not explicitly say this to the partner, or maybe the other partner clings on to the connection, hoping that something more would develop in the future.

What is the difference between casual and FWB?

One distinctive characteristic of friends with benefits arrangement is that both of them are friends even before they explore their own sexual relationship together. However, in casual relationships, people actually start dating without the pressure of wanting to be in a relationship soon. Therefore, there is no clear dateline to expect if this is going to turn into a relationship. This is where people actually go with the flow without even knowing how long to wait in order to see if this is going to turn into a relationship.

Are we friends or in a situationship?

If you have been in a sexual arrangement or connection with someone even if they are your friends before, it is no longer friendship because you have some level of chemistry and romantic involvement with them. However, it is also not a situation because you have not explicitly said to each other that you are dating them with the intention of getting to know them to see if this could turn into a relationship.

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