5 Lesser Known Pros of Being Single

Are you here looking for the pros of being single because you are trying to find how to stop wanting to be in a relationship and force yourself to be happy?

Are you looking at ways to be positive being single when you see your other single friends being happy?

Not sure if you should embrace your feelings and miseries that come with being single? How long am I supposed to be single? What is the point of living life that is not filled by people?

I have been at the exact point in life where I was looking for reasons to be happy and forced myself to do a lot of things to stay happy and grateful but to no avail.

However, when the mind shift finally happened, I now noticed a lot of pros of being single that I missed noticing earlier on in life.

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Forcing Yourself To Be A Happy Single Person

I am sure that you have heard a lot of people and life coaches saying that you should be happy single to be happy in a relationship. I know that being happy is not a prerequisite for entering a relationship.

We have all forced ourselves to attend therapies and do the inner work endlessly to pretend not to want a relationship.

To look at the positive aspects of life, we have started journaling every day and even resorted to keeping a gratitude journal to write down everything that we are grateful for in life.

However, when all you feel is frustration due to dating fatigue (possibly because you have no luck on dating apps) and looking at your friends settling down in life with their spouses and kids, no amount of positivity will be able to dispel the negative emotions surrounding your singleness.

I forced myself a lot to be happy single when all I felt was endless frustration. However, I gave myself until 35 to focus on dating and trying to build a family. 

Finally, when I hit 35, I had the piece of mind to let go of the pressure to settle down and quickly shifted my focus on my career.

So, if you are reading this post trying to force yourself to be happy and look at the pros of being single, do not force yourself as this would aggravate the frustration further.

Understand that you will be ready to embrace the shift in mindset when you are ready. Until then, sit with the discomfort and know that this phase will be over soon.

Most importantly, do not feel like a failure because you are not feeling happy like your other single friends are. This would make you feel even worse and keep you in a negative loop of emotions.

Does Being Happy Single Mean Hating Relationships?

So, are all single people happy, do they hate relationships, and are they avoiding relationships?

When we say that we should look at the positive sides of being happy being single, it does not mean that we should abhor relationships and people in general. If you think that you can live without people, it could be a sign of hyper independence trauma.

It does not mean that you should remove yourself from dating apps and all the efforts to find people and date. You should maintain a sense of self in order to avoid self preservation in relationship.

Therefore, even if you have a gratitude journal and try to list down things you are grateful for being single, you should not do that from the place of compulsion, but rather it should come from a calm state of mind.

Because, if you feel like you are being forced to find the positive things in life, it will not help in bringing about the shift of mind that you are looking for.

I’m looking at the pros of being single at this point, not with frustration towards dating or relationships in general, but I am just at peace with myself at the present moment without hating men or the dating process.

5 Lesser Known Pros of Being Single 

So, I know that we all have seen people listing down the common pros of being single like the independence that comes with it, the fact that you can do anything you want at any time, and you are not tied down to anyone specific in life.

However from a deeper level, when you look at things from a different perspective, there are other more meaningful positive sides of being single that we do not usually think of.

Let’s take a look at them and hopefully, these more in-depth perspectives of why being single can be a happy phase in life can help you bring about a change in perspective too.

1. Death Is Less Intimidating

Have you ever thought about dying alone? Who would cry when you die? Are you going to die alone?

I would say that death is one of the scariest aspects of a single person’s life because we all used to worry a lot about having to cruise through old age without family. This is especially true when it comes to death because nobody wants to be alone on their deathbed.

However, when you die, and when your soul finally departs your body, you actually wouldn’t feel a damn thing and you have no recollection of your present life. You wouldn’t know what will happen to your body and your belongings.

If you are single and you do not have kids, that’s also a bonus because you wouldn’t have a family to leave behind and therefore death becomes less intimidating.

Nobody is dependent on you, no kids waiting for you to come home to and feed them, no spouse to leave behind struggling with kids.

Do you actually realize that life is simpler when you are alone and there are not many things to be feared when it comes to death even if you are alone?

2. You Are Not Cheating On Anyone

One of the pros of being single is the fact that you could be dating a few people at a time and you actually won’t be cheating on anyone.

Imagine being married to the wrong person, and if you feel like wanting to date someone, that would be considered cheating.

In other words, you are still free to date as many people as you want because you have not committed to stick with one person for life yet.

You still have a lot of opportunities to vet through people and make the best decision you could ever take when it comes to picking your life partner.

So, if you’re single and you are worried about never having enough time to settle down, understand that somebody else out there is with the wrong person and is struggling to get out of a marriage, and also is in the position of not being able to date anyone else even if they are not getting the love they deserve from the partner 😉.

3. You Have More Time With Your Family

Ever wanted to spend more time with your parents, earn more money, and bring them for a vacation that they deserve?

If you’re single, you still have the chance of earning well and spending on your parents and family because you have all the time to do so right now.

When we were in our 20s, as a fresh graduate, we were all struggling to establish a career and usually were not in the position to spend money on our parents.

A lot of people would have settled down by the age of 30 and the focus would have shifted to the new family that they are building. This makes it incredibly difficult to focus on the parents or siblings.

If you are single, count your blessings because you have more time to spend with your parents and siblings and repay their sacrifices made for you as a sign of gratitude.

4. You Learn To Think Out Of The Box

So, we were all taught to study well, get a good job, get a house, get married, and have kids. Because that is the default setting in society for the longest time. This is also the reason why a lot of single people worry a lot because when you do not have kids and family, your future literally feels bleak and dark.

But when you have been in the dating pool for a very long time to know a veil, and you are used to the feeling of being depressed and sad about the future, you will arrive at a point where you will be forced to think out of the box.

I recently came across friends who are single and are saving up money to invest in an old folks home or perhaps a caregiving home. It is something that is gaining popularity in this era because we have more single people now than ever.

With all the money that you have, you could hire people to take care of you when you are old, or even move into a caregiving home if you’re sick.

So, it’s not that you will always end up being alone because the future is unpredictable and you will probably have more friends than you think you would in the future.

5. You Could Still Have A Family

Single mothers by choice is becoming a popular option nowadays with the advancement of technology and fertility treatment where women could freeze their eggs or even get pregnant through donor sperm.

This is definitely one of the pros of being single because who would ever think that women could choose to have their own family without being dependent on the presence of men? Therefore if your goal is to become a mother in your life, you could still have a family although you are not doing it with a partner.

The best part of all is, that a single mother by choice could also find a partner who is suitable for her in the future if she comes across someone. Therefore, women do not have to delay having kids just because they have not found the right person yet.

Imagine being able to become a parent and not being forced to accommodate your in-laws and the lifestyle into your own and raise your kids with a good balance of both your and your spouse’s family values and upbringings.

You decide how to raise your kids and that would lift a lot of pressure from your life because you do not need to negotiate and compromise a lot of things when it comes to parenting.

My Experience

From the age of 28 until I hit 35, I was actively dating and I have spoken to countless men and gone out on many dates with people.

I forced myself to be positive and look at the pros of being single rather than being desperate or sad about being single. It further pains me when I look at other single people who are content with their lives.

However, trying to infuse happiness into my life did not make a positive change at all because I believe that you have heard that you cannot force happiness to happen and it has to be felt naturally.

Therefore, I waited until I had to naturally start feeling comfortable being single as soon as I hit the age of 35. Sometimes, being 35 and single can feel depressing but also liberating because you know that you have given your best in life in dating and it is now time to focus on yourself.

So, give yourself a timeline and let the positive shift happen on its own, and then you will start seeing the pros of being single better.

FAQs

Are there advantages to being single?

When compared to being in a relationship with the wrong person, being single definitely has its own advantages. This is because you are not in a partnership with someone toxic that requires more of your energy and time. Single people too have a lot of options to seek emotional support be it in the form of friendship or family members. Basically, when single people are not tied to anyone for life, the possibilities are endless.

Why it feels good to be single?

Single people can choose how and where to channel their energy with more freedom than people in relationships. Financially, they have lesser burden because they only have themselves to take care of, and they do not need to deal with issues that come along with a partner and their family members. 

What are the pros and cons of single life?

Some of the pros of being single include the freedom to move around and decide to live in different cities, the ability to rent and state of buying a house, the flexibility to choose different career paths, and the time to spend with loved ones and family members.

The cons of a single life include the absence of emotional support from a loved one. Apart from that, single people too will usually have a higher level of emotional instability that follows uncertainty about the future. Single people need to be really careful about their health and wealth because they do not have anyone else to depend on.

Why it is healthier to be single?

It is healthier to be single as compared to being in a toxic relationship because it Increases social connections. Single people are free to move around and meet different people as well as date multiple people at the same time because they have not committed to staying with one person lifelong yet. Therefore, the future holds endless possibilities when it comes to single people in terms of choosing to meet different people from all walks of life.

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