If I Let Him Go Will He Come Back?

If I let him go will he come back? If I go no contact with him and give him the space that he deserves, will he exit my life and will I not have a chance to get closer to him ever? 

So, you’re here because you are experiencing distress in a relationship or probably you’re dating someone and things are not really going well and you really like him. That’s the problem. And you’re wondering if at all it is the right time to give space for someone.

“If I let him go will he come back?”

It’s not an easy situation to be in especially when you really like someone and things are not going well but you have to do what is good for the both of you at this point in time. But, let’s look into the possibilities of him coming back to you, and let’s try to gauge some situations that you can foresee in the future if you let him go right now.

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My Experience

I have never exactly had a situation where I was in a relationship with someone and then I had to let him go and then wonder if he’s gonna ever come back to me. However, I have been in a situationship, rather, a few situationships, where I had feelings for them and then I was not able to let them go and I was clingy because I did not want to lose access to them. 

Well, it is embarrassing and I know that we all have been there. However, I’m here to recollect my memories and try to see what had happened in my past in this exact situation where I had to let people go and see if at all they’re gonna come back to me. 

In most cases when people have explicitly said that they are not ready or probably they are just not looking for a serious relationship, people do not circle back to me because they actually have a good intention for me and they do not want to toy around with my feelings. 

These kinds of people actually do not want to harm you and they just want to let you know the reality about the connection that you have with them.

They have not miraculously texted me out of the blue until and unless I made an initiative to maybe just text them occasionally for their birthdays and things like that.

On the other hand, there are people who actually come back to me even after saying that they are not ready for a relationship. Now, these are the jackasses that you need to really beware of because come on boy, they really suck the energy out of you! 

They are doing this because they know for a fact that you like them and they are emotions just for a cheap ego stroke. 

Also, in the past, I was dating someone during the pandemic and it was virtual dates with him. There was a point in time where he was sort of ghosting me and I did not hear anything back from him. I sent him a text saying that I had not heard from him and I didn’t deserve to be treated this way and therefore did not want to have anything to do with him anymore. I did not get a text back for this.

However, out of the blue, one day he texted me saying that he was in emotional distress and he was sorry about it and things like that which made me think that probably is genuine. However, when I started to meet him often for dates to come I learned that he actually is not looking for a relationship.

So, always remember that even if someone comes back, it is always about the changed behavior that they are going to display this time around. These are wishy washy guys who will suck the energy out of you and I don’t want this happening to me being 35 and single, and when I date to marry.

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If I Let Him Go Will He Come Back?

What you really need to do over here is to actually not really be obsessed with if he is going to come back but obsessed about the intention if at all he comes back to you.

1. If He Regrets His Decision

Say you have been in a relationship with him and you decide to take a break and you want to let him go, and of course, you’d be wondering if I let him go will he come back?

This is because you have invested a lot of time in getting to know this person, and forming a relationship with this person as well. You could have had arguments with him and it does not matter who is at fault but if the both of you need some space and time apart, then this is the right thing to do.

If he has made some mistakes and of course during a heated argument, nobody is going to ever see their mistakes. People tend to see their mistakes when they are given some space and time to think about them. This gives sufficient personal time to reflect on what has happened.

Why does it take guys 8 weeks to miss you? Because he needs time to learn about his loss and he will come back to you after realizing that he is at fault and he misses you.

2. If He Is Testing Your Emotions

If you are just dating someone and you are not sure if he is being serious with you, and you just want to take away your attention from him, and you decide to let him go, what can happen is that he can come back to you if he notices that he is no longer having your attention.

He may have thought that you would reach out to him first but if you’re not reaching out to him first and he kind of senses that you’re going to move on soon and you are doing just okay without him, it is going to give him some sort of insecurity and he knows that he is on the losing end.

People like this actually come back in order to tie in with the emotions because they just want to stroke their ego. 

If you have been in a relationship and your guy is circling back to you because you have not apologized to him and you’re being very firm with your stones, it will signal to him that you’re a strong person and you have a strong opinion about things, he will come back because he realizes that he cannot toy with the emotions anymore.

3. If He Needs and Is Dependent On You

This is another type of category of men who actually need you and are dependent on you more than you need them. 

Probably you have had a disagreement on a few things and it is a small argument, that after letting him go, if he comes back to you within a couple of days, it goes to show that he is dependent on you on some level. 

His emotions could be disturbed and he may not be able to live without communicating with you and then quickly circling back to you. This happened in my last relationship whereby my ex-boyfriend was someone who was emotionally dependent on me and he was quite clingy therefore after arguments, we rarely had the space and time to reflect on things because he always circled back to me.

Why Are You Having A Hard Time Letting Go?

Forget about if at all he is going to come back to you. Think about why you are having a hard time letting him go in the first place.

• You Are Afraid You Won’t Find Someone Else

You are thinking that you’re gonna be at the Voyager of a breakup and you are afraid you won’t find someone else. This is especially true if you’re dating in your 30s and you have been in a brief relationship with someone all have been getting to know someone and you have to let this person go for some reason.

The fear of starting everything all over again and then putting your emotional energy into getting to know a new person is going to be emotionally taxing. You want to avoid all these unnecessary stresses and probably you would also justify to yourself that every relationship is going to be difficult and every person has their own vices, so I might as well just put up with this person and make things happen with this person.

• You Are Afraid of Being Alone

So when you are letting go of someone, you ultimately need to stay alone for a brief period of time until they come back to you. This means that you will have a lot of time for self-reflection and you need to embrace the loneliness that comes with it. 

If you have not been practicing having a healthy amount of alone time for yourself, this can be something scary to do. Ask yourself if you are actually afraid of being alone and if at all you are attaching your self-worth to being with someone.

• You Don’t Have Self-Respect

In a lot of cases when someone wants to go, they are actually not ready to be in a relationship with you. If you’re being clingy with them and you are refusing to let them go, it goes to show that you do not have self-respect because you are crossing the boundaries of someone else and you are also settling for breadcrumbs and love that is not being offered to you fully.

• You Are Afraid Of Rejection 

You do not also want to let people go because you are afraid of rejection. You are actually afraid of being on the verge of heartbreak and you want to give yourself the false sense of perception that you are still having access to them and nothing is going wrong because you are holding on to them. 

However, what you need to realize is that they have long left the relationship and they actually are not in the mental capacity to offer you love anymore.

FAQs

Will a man come back if you let him go?

If you let him go and that I actually chances of the both of you mending the relationship, he would most likely circle back to you. This also depends on the level of understanding that you have between the both of you and also the level of arguments that you have had prior to the separation.

Do exes come back when you let them go?

Exes could return if they realize that there are no other women out there like you and if they miss your connection. As a matter of fact, when people separate due to small arguments and they move on to find someone else come on they often compare the new partners with their previous partner because they are looking for a lot of things that they found in the past partner.

Will a guy come back if I leave him alone?

It is going to depend on a few things like if at all it is his mistake and if he realizes his mistake, and if the argument was small enough for him to look past that and come back to you. Another reason why a guy will come back is because he realizes your worth as a whole and he knows that he’s not going to find a connection like the one that he had with you with other women out there.

Will he come back if I go silent?

In a relationship, that should be some level of healthy jealousy and fights were only my people closer if they realize that it will make them lose access to you. So a guy will return to you if he misses you and your silence is actually deafening to the extent that he cannot live without communicating with you.